PTElephant

I've been really slow to produce anything since my meds have changed, so I'm sorry for the lack of work recently. I can't really say what it is, other than a lack of motivation. It's not necessarily depression, but it does feel like something is missing or blocked in regards to that part of my brain. I'm hoping I'll adjust and it'll clear up soon. If not, I may have to change it up.

I haven't written a journal entry in a while, since most of my updates have been in the form of a YouTube video/website blog post. However, I feel it's imperative that I write this clearly. PLEASE DO NOT send me requests for nsfw art and ESPECIALLY DO NOT send me requests for illegal and immoral representations of minors and/or sexual violence/fetishes. I don't report the nonviolent fetishes to DA Admin, but I will absolutely report any request for sexually violent art. Although I try not to judge fetishes concerning consenting adults, I don't feel comfortable drawing them. Concerning the sexual violence/illegal and immoral representations of minors, I'm a survivor of childhood sexual violence. However, even if I wasn't, that wouldn't change my feelings about those things. It is absolutely abhorrent to victimize children and/or represent children being exploited or victimized. Any solicitations or messages about this will result in an instant block and will be reported to DeviantArt

I'll probably make an update video soon for those of you who haven't been in the loop. I haven't been really active online because my great grandmother passed less that two weeks ago. We saw it coming, but it still hit pretty hard and I've been finding it super hard to finish anything. I've mostly been floating around from one project to the next and halfheartedly cleaning and organizing the house. She raised me and was one of the only people who ever remembered to pick me up from school growing up. I was so quiet as a kid, my mom, grandmother, etc all thought I was already home somehow? She was often the only one to worry about/check on me. She checked on everyone. Honestly, I cannot even imagine how on earth she kept track of so many people - literally all over the world (my family is TOO BIG). I wrote a eulogy, but because of the pandemic, I couldn't attend her funeral, so no one bothered to read it. It's okay though, since she didn't really want a funeral anyway, but it didn't